A Jenkins Is Born

(Clockwise from top left: Marsha, Velma, Daph, AnnaBelle, Yolanda and Pinkie in the studio.)

Sorry darlings, I know that it’s been a while since I posted. However, this past weekend was a landmark in Jenkins history and has taken us all several days to recover from. For one thing, it was the birthdays of both Pinkie D. Jenkins and Velma G. Jenkins. As if that wasn’t reason enough to party like rock stars, we also witnessed the birth of a brand new Jenkins sibling, AnnaBelle Larue Jenkins.

Yes ladies, Omar from The Other O podcast finally submitted to an extreme drag makeover at the hands of the Jenkins clan. Lord knows, she already had the personality of a catty drag queen. Well, after we were done with her, she also had the unmistakable style and sass of one as well. Complete with face by Alexandria Martin, a dress picked out by Mookie, and the signature blonde roller disco wig, she was a Chicana to be reckoned with.

After recording a boozy podcast, we all headed over to our first stop of the evening, The Oscar’s. In the parking lot, an ambulance came screeching over to us. At first I feared that they might think we were escapees from a local mental institute. However, they (like the rest of the populace) simply wanted to snap a few pics of our undeniable fabulousness.

Our presence inside the bar was a blaring signal for the party to start. AnnaBelle is a popular gal and had lots of pals to harass and molest. We all took turns taking photos beneath the glory hole art. I kid you not; they have a framed glory hole on the wall.

Eventually, we fled the suffocating cigarette smoke at Oscar’s headed over to Burkhart’s. This was definitely a good move because the boys there were wild and randy. I honestly lost track of how much I had to drink as the hotties bought me round after round. At one point in the evening, Annabelle had one trashy stud pulling his junk out for our inspection. Next, I looked over to witness a man with his head underneath Velma’s skirt. How unladylike! These girls have obviously been taking lessons from Pinkie.

Mary Edith Pitts and Kitty LeClaw were hosting the Saturday Showcase drag show with such superstars as Jade Daniels and Chili. Naturally, Kitty had to bring attention to the herd of gorgeous Jenkins sisters in the audience. When asked where we bought our fashions, Annabelle screeched in classic Jenkins style, “Goodwill!”

Not one to let the revelry end, Pinkie insisted that we continue on to another bar once Burkhart’s started to die down. Marsha led us all to a destination I had never been to, the infamous Phoenix. This seedy little hovel is the reputed hangout of choice for hustlers and drug addicts. Therefore, it’s no surprise that the Jenkins clan was welcomed with open arms. Here I am boning up on my billiard skills.

One would think that after that wild night out, we’d be laying low for a little while. But oh no! I’ll be making a very special appearance this Friday that’s sure to be a total blast. Stop by later this week for all the details on this surprise gig.

Smooches,
Daph

Phoenix From The Flame

(Momma Dale, Candy, Omar, Alexandria, Dannyboy, DJ and Peggy feel the excitement of The Glamazons' premiere at The Red Chair.)

The Glamazons have arisen from the ashes of The Armory to take their rightful place in the Atlanta drag scene as the Friday night showcase at The Red Chair in Midtown. The Jenkins clan was on the scene to wish Ziggy and her troupe loads of luck in their new digs. As an added treat, that Latino hunk, Omar, of The Other O podcast joined us for the show with two of his frisky friends, James and Micah.

Needless to say, the crowd was not disappointed as the entire cast opened the show and slayed them dead with their homicidal "Cell Block Tango" routine. Everyone was hiding the sharp objects as these murderous mavens announced to the Atlanta queens that they are here to stay.

The first gal to have a solo number was their illustrious leader, Ziggy Stardust. Ziggy came out in a shimmering white gown and sashayed around the audience to one of her signature down-home blues numbers.

Isabella Diamante hypnotized the crowd next with her exotic fan dance. Like a scene out of "Crouching Drag Queen, Hidden Candy" she exemplified poise and beauty.

Next up, Lateasha Shante-Shuntel held up the joint with her spirited rendition of "What's Going On". Candy Jenkins was green with envy over Lateasha's diamond studded glock chocker.

Speaking of envy, Miss Envy Van-Michaels rocked the crowd next with her booty shakin' and fierce attitude.

Emcee Chynna Fox then proceeded to bring the house down with her spot-on Madonna impersonation for "Hung Up". The Jenkins clan cackled with glee when Chynna spread her legs and a dollar bill slowly wafted down from her crotch. Where exactly were the audience members trying to tip her? As she said after someone came up and dry humped her at the end of the song, "Honey, that costs more than a dollar. You need to get out the plastic for that."

All in all, it was an unforgettable premiere for a great group of gals. It was wonderful to see The Glamazons finally receiving the adoration and acclaim that they deserve. So, be sure to check them out every Friday night at 9:30 pm at The Red Chair.

By the way, I ran across another legendary performer Saturday night over at Mary's in East Atlanta for their karaoke night. The queen of diamonds, Diamond Lil, was on hand to perform a few numbers for her rabid fans. She delivered a sultry "Rock Me Like A Man" and then proceeded to hit on DJ. That DJ's such a drag magnet.

Next weekend promises to be another blowout as we celebrate Pinkie's centennial and subject Omar to his extreme drag makeover. Let's hope Omar doesn't steal too much thunder from Pinkie or she might cut him so that no one will wanna f#%k him.

Smooches,
Daph

The Show Must Go On

(The legendary leader of the Glamazons, Ziggy Stardust, blinding Daphne Ruth Jenkins with her dazzling star power.)

I know it seems like just a few short weeks ago that I reported on the final weekend of The Glamazons at The Armory. Well, that's because it was literally two weeks ago. Apparently, these lovely ladies work quickly, though, because they have already secured a new home for their world-class cabaret act.

Starting this Friday, January 20 at 9:30 pm, you'll be able to catch Ziggy Stardust, Chynna Fox and the rest of those delicious divas over at The Red Chair in Midtown Atlanta. I've gotta say, I sort of prefer the earlier show time. This queen ain't getting any younger and the sooner I can start partying, the sooner I can head home for some much-needed beauty rest.

So, start the weekend off right by joining DJ and I as we cheer on the Red Chair premiere of the gorgeous Glamazons:

When - Friday, January 20 at 9:30 pm
Where - The Red Chair
Who - The Glamazons

It's sure to be the entertainment event of the season. If you get there early, save me a seat at the bar. If you get there late, kindly pick me up off the floor.

Smooches,
Daph

All Juiced Up

(It takes lots of vitamins and antioxidants to build strong draq queen bones and muscles.)

Many of my ardent fans have asked how I retain my vibrant youth and beauty despite the hectic schedule and ceaseless demands on the life of a drag superstar. Well, a gal's gotta retain some mystery. However, I will let my faithful readers in on one little secret: fresh juice. Ladies, when I joke that I'm going on a liquid diet, I'm only half kidding. Nothing keeps a gal bright-eyed and glowing from within like a shot of fresh beet juice in the morning. I kid you not. Besides, it's as easy as mixing a stiff cocktail.

Of course, it helps to have a good juicer. I highly recommend Jack LaLanne's Power Juicer. It's reasonably priced and available at your local Target (pronounced Tar-gay). Gusty Winds and Rose Petal over at My Favorite Drag Queen own one and I can tell you that it is a superior product.

Next up, you need high-quality, fresh fruits and vegetables. I prefer mine organic. The flavor can't be beat and you don't have to worry about those pesky pesticides and antibiotics. Granted, antibiotics come in handy in a pinch (just ask my sister, Pinkie). However, you don't want them in your produce, thereby building up an immunity to their medicinal effects. Luckily, we have a fantastic Farmer's Market here in Hotlanta where we take care of all our produce needs.

So for the uninitiated, here's a fabulous recipe that I call "Sweet Jenkins Juice". It's great on it's own or can be spiced up with a shot of vitamin V: vodka!

Ingredients:

• 2 handfuls raspberries
• 2 handfuls cranberries (just great for the urinary tract!)
• 1 apple
• 1/2 stalk lemongrass (trimmed and chopped)
• 6fl oz. mineral water (still or sparkling, but I prefer San Pellegrino)

Cut the apple into pieces and use it to push the raspberries, cranberries and lemongrass through the juicer tube. This helps to get the most flavor for your brew. Then, pour the mineral water in with your fresh juice. Mix with vodka or enjoy all on its own. Just dee-lish-us!

If you have any great fruit or vegetable juices that you swear by, please let me know. I try to constantly switch things up depending on the season and what's available. Variety is the spice of life; that goes for produce as well as men.

Smooches,
Daph

Tasty Thai Treats

(One of the tantalizing Thai performers from the lovely Lady-boys.)

That Velma's such a globetrotting gal! During one of her recent jaunts in the Far East, she stumbled across the latest sensation sweeping the tourism trade in Hong Kong: the Lady-boys. They're a talented troupe of transsexual Thai performers that are pulling in more business than Disneyland Hong Kong. And no wonder; who wouldn't prefer a ride on Glam Mountain any day?

Check out the CNN video of these gorgeous gals to get an idea of the excitement and drama involved. Certainly, the elaborate costumes and productions numbers are a large part of the reason that they're able to fill their 800-seat venue 5 times a day. Talk about a grueling schedule; I bet even Gigi Monroe would have a hard time keeping up with these womanly work-a-holics. However, as the photo to the right attests, several of the ladies employ the Jenkins family secrets: glitter and unnatural colored hair.

I'm sure Charlie Brown wouldn't mind that kind of business. Maybe she can book them at her Cabaret for their next step in world domination.

Smooches,
Daph

DWD #1: Pigskin Party

(A scene from the scandalous, never-aired ad for Monday Night Football featuring Daphne Ruth Jenkins.)

TAPED: Sunday, January 8, 2006
LENGTH: 20 minutes and 35 seconds
HOSTS: Velma and Daphne
SYNOPSIS: Daphne and Velma discuss the first round of NFL playoffs and explain why they love the NFL.

Greetings and welcome to the inaugural Dishin' With Daphne podcast, Pigskin Party. Velma and I have been having such a blast recording shows with our wacky Jenkins clan over at Drag-O-Drama that we decided to create our very own spin-off. Hopefully, we'll be more like The Jeffersons from All In The Family, or Frasier from Cheers; rather than Joey from Friends.

Our very first episode will delve into the wonderful world of the NFL. I know, some of you are questioning what a couple of deranged drag queens are doing talking about football: well you just listen and see. This past weekend was the start of playoffs and we have the scoop on all the games.

Distant Jenkins relative, Clinton Portis, and The Washington Redskins defeat the Tampa Bay Buccanneers 17-10.




That tasty trio from the New England Patriots (Tom Brady, Tedy Bruschi and Adam Vinatieri) defeat the Jacksonville Jaguars 28-3.








Sweet cheeked quarterback Jake Delhomme's Carolina Panthers deliver an ass-whooping to the New York Giants with a 23-0 victory.







Garishly costumed Cincinnati Bengals are trampled by the orc-like Pittsburgh Steelers with Troy Polamalu and his roller disco hair, 17-31.








Shout outs: Woofs, Linda Hand Jenkins, Pinkie D. Jenkins, Momma Dale, Gusty Winds and Rose Petal of My Favorite Drag Queen.

I hope you enjoy our first Dishin' With Daphne podcast as much as we enjoyed making it. Be sure to stop by for more wild and wacky topics and guests.

Smooches,
Daph

Frap Me!

("But Linda, it's true: that skirt doesn't make your ass look fat; your fat ass makes your ass look fat!")

Frap me, baby! Frap me all night long! I resisted as long as I could. However, my dear sister, Pinkie chastised me during last night's podcast for not having my own Frappr map. I'm sure she only wants me to get one so that she can gloat that she has more "friends" on her map than I do.

(Drag queens gone wild! My shy and demure sister Pinkie D. Jenkins)
So, bop on over to my map and let me know where you live. That way, when I wind up homeless and destitute, I have some options about what part of the country to crash in.

On a side note, I've added a few new websites to my list of links. First up is the glamtastic Gigi Monroe's website. Be sure to peruse the videos for some truly mind-blowing performances. Check out that fabulous crimson gown she wears in the "Alone" video. It's actually a wedding dress that she bought from Momma Dale and Gigi-fied. Gorgeous and talented: it's a good thing that she's so nice or I'd have to hate that bitch!

For a change of pace, check out Film Stock, a new blog from one of my biggest fans. There's a quirky combination of revealing film reviews and delectable vegetarian recipes. Don't worry Pinkie, where the recipes call for tofu, just substitute with baby back ribs.

Smooches,
Daph

Goodbye To The Glamazons

("Don't I look thin under this huge sign?" Daphne Ruth Jenkins in front of Atlanta institution, The Armory.)

Alas, the rumors are true. That Atlanta institution, The Armory, has closed its doors for the final time. The building has been sold and is sure to be replaced by another cheaply constructed condominium complex or office tower. Midtown needs more condos like I need another drink!

Momma Dale, Peggy, Pinkie and I insisted on making a final trip to The Armory to see The Glamazons during their final weekend of residency there. It was a bittersweet affair as we marveled at the spellbinding skills of these talented temptresses.

I was a little nervous about showing my beautiful face there after having missed my last gig with The Amazons on Halloween weekend due to that unscheduled visit with the grim reaper. However, all trepidation was cast aside as I entered the club and was greeted with open arms by Pierre, the hottie behind the scenes.

I was most nervous about seeing Ziggy, the leading lady of The Glamazons. However, she jumped up and down with excitement when she saw me slung up at the bar. That performing legend took the time to sit down and to give me some words of encouragement. What a lady! She also assured me that the closing of The Armory is only a temporary setback and that the show will go on. I can't wait to see what they do next!

It was also great to see my old pal, Gigi Monroe, slaying 'em as always. She came out in a giant white dove costume and totally nailed a "When Doves Cry"/"Edge of Seventeen" medley. I definitely peed a little to see her channeling Stevie Nicks on stage.

Momma Dale and I had a blast running through the rest of the club where they were celebrating a goth/s&m theme party. It was a trip having cuties dressed in latex and leather looking at me like I was a freak. One darling deviant marched up to me and squealed, "You look like you're from outer space!" You better believe it darling; I'm from the planet of Uranus.

So, until the Glamazons find a new home, a special thanks from the bottom of my pickled heart to:

Cartier - for your beauty and captivating smile
Isabella - for keeping me from falling apart backstage
Envy - for your fierce sexuality
Lateasha - for your indomitable strength
Gigi - for your amazing work ethic
Chynna - for your biting wit
Ziggy - for always being true to yourself

We'll miss you ladies and can't wait for you to find a new home for your show. Momma Dale made Chynna and Ziggy promise to come to the trailer as special guests on Drag-O-Drama. Hopefully, they can give us an exclusive scoop on their plans.

Smooches,
Daph

("But I'm on the guest list, motherf#cker!" Daphne Ruth Jenkins trying to get back into the now closed Armory.)