Loose Harlots Approach Kentucky!

(The infamous Linda Hand Jenkins and reigning Miss Central Station, Bo Lima Jenkins, prepare for the kill.)

I just received this special bulletin from special agent Glendella down in Savannah, Georgia:

ALERT..............

WARNING....North Carolina SLUTS are about to invade Louiseville, KY... Be prepared as they are very cunning and when intoxicated could be vicious. Keep small children, pets, and especially hot good looking well hung men AWAY FROM THEM. We here at the Burea of Slut Protection highly advise you to take all necessary measures including: Hide all liquors, good make-up and cosmetics including expensive perfumes, erotic clothing, fierce shoes, loose change, steaks in the freezer, and dildos bigger than 15 inches.
YOU HAVE BEEN NOTIFIED

The Burea ( BOSP) assumes no liabilty for damages after receipt of this notice.

That's right folks, Linda Hand and Bo Lima Jenkins have packed their bags and are on their way to Looseville as I post this very message. They promise to cause untold mayhem and havoc over the coming weekend. Don't let their unnaturally colored hair, wild makeup and flashy fashions distract you from their sinister intent. The following image is not for the faint of heart, but it's important that the masses be informed of their true nature:

Whew! Hearty thanks go out to Glendella for this very important advisory. Emergency updates will follow as required.

Smooches,

Daph

Marsha's 80's Prom

(Marsha, Heava Beava, Yolanda and Miss Glover looking respendant in their formal wear.)

This is just a quick post to let you all know that last weekend, the Jenkins clan descended upon the lavish destination known as The River's Edge Campground and threw one of their infamous parties that will be talked about for years to come: The Marsha 80's Prom. I don't know that I've ever seen Swirl and Peggy Sue looking so ghoulishyly gorgeous!

Unfortunatley, I was unable to cut my resort stay short so I had to miss this sensational soiree. However, I've drooled over the photos so often that if I take just the right mixture of vicodin and vodka I can almost convince myself I was there.

Natually, only the finest entertainment was provided. Here you can see some awe-inspiring shots of Marsha and Momma Dale rockin' out. Who needs Kelly and Britney when you have these hot blooded pop stars in your midst?

I have to say that Miss Pinkie Devine Jenkins really outdid herself for the event. She was looking even more gorgeous and loose than usual. Here she is returning to the scene of the crime. Yes, that is the very same kitchen where Pinkie was caught in a compromising position during the Miss Beaver Creek Grey Water Trailer Park Princess Pageant. What a surprise to see her again canoodling with a big hunk of a man behind that kitchen counter. I guess it's really true what they say, you can't teach an old whore new tricks!

You can however, tell her to clean that dirty p#ssy! Here she is after all those mis-adventures soaking in the hot tub with Momma Dale. What a couple of bathing beauties. Let's hope there was plenty of chlorine in that water!

Clearly this was the social event of the season. See for yourself; there's a gorgeous gallery over on Kodakgallery and another on the Drag-O-Rama Flickr site. The pics I've posted here only hint at the glamour and carnage that you'll witness.

Smooches,

Daphne

The Magnificent Marquise

(The multi-talented Marquise doing her best Marilyn impression.)


I was recently doing my usual 2am drunk surfing on the web routine when I stumbled upon the most delightful surprise over on YouTube. I came across a charming Canadian queen by the name of Marquise who immediately struck me as a long-lost relative of the Jenkins clan. After watching a few of her videos, I simply had to send her some love. We hit it off instantly. I simply had to share this latest discovery with my friends and fans.



Daphne: Marquise, you're just fabulous gurl! Where have you been hiding? I know everyone out there is dying to know where you hang your hat.


Marquise: I perform in several clubs in Montreal and a few places that would surprise you! I began performing at Cabaret Mado which is Montreal's most reputable drag bar, owned by none other than Mado herself. I also perform at Skye Club on occassion; this year I'm running for Miss Skye 2007... I hope to end world hunger and cure metrosexuality! *Laughs* However, the real joy for me is performing in places other than "gay bars." I find there's a certain thrill to doing a drag number in front of a bunch of straight men... What can i say, I live dangerously. That being said, in the summer I host a Karaoke night at a local bar called "Clydes." Its as much of a dive as its name leads you to believe!

Daphne: Straight guys...dive bars...you are an honorary Jenkins. Damn, you sound like one busy betch! How did your illustrious drag career get started?

Marquise: I've been doing drag since I was 16 years old... Well in all honesty, I've been doing drag since I was three years old. Wasn't getting paid for it then! I used to put on my best friend's princes dress and run around the neighborhood as various fairytale characters. Now I mostly run around the village chasing fairies' tails! *Sighs at his own terrible pun.* There's also this adorable picture of me at the age of three with my aunts fur boa and WAY to much blush! I look more and more like her everyday!

Daph: Well, clearly you were born to be a diva. What gets your juices flowing in order to motivate you to keep bringing it time after time for your fans?


Marquise: Inspiration comes to me from every direction, and I mean that quite literally! In order to come up with an idea or a number I pull from all sorts of different mediums: movies, books, videogames, television, celebrities, music... Often, I'll emulate a character and ask myself, what would she be like if she were a drag queen? My main character, Marquise, is a compilation of my favourite female heroines... Most notably are Marie-Antoinette and Becky Sharp from William Makepeace Thackery's Vanity Fair. But as you've witnessed in my video's I also do a lot with disney movies! Nothing like corrupting the innocent! Currently I'm working on a number/look inspired by the video game series Kingdom Hearts. I must confess, this look is for a very special boy. Who knows, maybe it will make the tabloids!



Daph: Ooooh, I love a little dirty laundry. We'll have to continue that conversation off-line. For now, let's take a quick break and watch one of your videos. This one is absolutely pee-inducing!





Daph: Honey, I just love that number. Pure genuis! And the fact that you're doing your own vocals is fierce. Okay, let's get down to the nitty gritty. Tell me about your pet peeves.

Marquise: Pet peeves? Hmmmmm! I hate short boys! I wish I was short! People are always saying crap like: Wow! Your so tall! Yeah, thanks I know! I'm 6'4" btw! I wish I was shorter. When I wear my platform heels I look like a spice girl that could kick your fucking ass! Excuse me unlady-like language, I was raised by sailors! I also hate people who aren't punctual, and shoe sizes that only go up to 10! What the hell is that? Oh, and Nicholas Cage... he disgusts me!!



Daph: One of the things that I love about you is that you have a decidedly Jenkins flair to your appearance. However, you always make it work for you and come off as radiantly beautiful. Any essential beauty tips for the gals out there?


Marquise: My essential beauty tip? *Laughs hysterically* I have so much knowledge to impart to this world... its hard to pick just one! So I'll try and do a 2 for one! Lighting and angles. Girls, avoid overhead lighting like the plague, and if ever the paparazzi try and shoot you making out with Kevin Federline, make sure they don't take the pic looking up at your chin. Otherwise you'll look like Kirstie Ally before she met Jenny!


Daph: Words to live by! Thanks for taking the time to answer my questions, lovely lady. And I hope all my readers out there take a few minutes to go over to YouTube to discover the myriad of other fabulous videos Marquise has posted. Don't forget to drop the little lady a love note when you do.


Smooches,
Daph

On Your Knees

(Shawna The Dead getting ready to take a bite out of Daphne.)

The kind folks at FuZion Night Club invited me back again this past Saturday to torment their patrons with more of my demented numbers. And to think, it's not even Halloween yet! As a special treat, Manitee Goldburger offered to paint my face for the night. I was a little concerned that she might not give me that bold look that my fans are accustomed to. As you can see from the pics, though, Manitee certainly knows how to set the spackle gun to whore with the best of them.

For my first number of the evening, I decided to mix things up a bit by pulling out my old Scissor Sisters' "Filthy/Gorgeous" routine. I'm all about a feel-good-tranny-hooker anthem. I was certainly feeling the hot groove of the song despite suffering from a miserable hangover. Just once I'd like to wake up the day of a show without a splitting headache. Oh yeah, I could drink less!

For my second number, I premiered a fierce little Groovasaurus song called, "On Your Knees". They're an old Boston band that I used to absolutely adore/stalk back when I lived there. The lead singer, Anita, has this killer voice that literally stops you in your tracks. I've always wanted to work one of their songs into a routine and this was my wish come true. It was a real thrill getting back into my leather and ordering those hot little goth boys to submit to the will of Daphne!

Of course, the show was not just all about me. I shared the stage with the fierce Nevaeh for the first time. Sister girl is sweet, thin, gorgeous and disgustingly talented. I hate her. Just kidding! Really, this girl can dance.

Uhura really outdid herself this week. She had the nerve to perform a c#m bucket number that included an actual pale filled with a creamy white substance that both she and the audience guzzled down. What a whore! Loved it!

As usual, the night did not end with the show. The Luscious Lane whisked me away to the elegant environs of Woody's for a little post performance revelry. Here you can see him showing me his pinball wizard moves. Of course that's nothing compared to the tricks I showed him when we got home. But that story's not fit for publication.

What is fit for publication, though, are all the hot pics that were taken that night. Be sure to drop by my homepage, Down with Daphne, to drool over all the hot action.

Well, it looks like I have a few weeks off to prepare for Halloween. The lovely Linda Hand Jenkins and the newly crowned Miss Central Station, Bo Lima Jenkins, are coming to Looseville. This town may never be the same.

Smooches,

Daphne