Greetings Groupies!

Hello adoring fans!

International performing sensation Daphne Ruth Jenkins here. I was inspired by my sister, Pinkie Devine Jenkins who recently started her own blog. I figure if that illiterate hussy can string together a few coherent thoughts now and again, surely I can sober up long enough to convey a few morsels of dish to my degenerate twin Dannyboy every now and again. Lord knows he's all about taking DICtation every chance he gets.

The big news this holiday weekend is that I'll be attending Momma Dale's festive fourth of July soiree. The Jenkins sisters will be doing a few numbers that are sure to be more explosive than any fireworks display. The highlight of the evening will be when I receive the Miss Beaver Creek Grey Water Trailer Park Princess 2005 crown. Yes, I will finally get my immaculately manicured claws on that baby. Truly, it is a tragedy that the original winner, Miss Visa Decline, was taken from us so unexpectedly. However, I for one can think of no diva more deserving to carry on the fabulous tradition. We adore and miss you terribly, Visa!

Hopefully, our latest sister, Miss Dolly Wood Jenkins will be making her premiere performance at the bash. I sense great things from that little trollop. Miss BCGWTPP 2006, look out!

Well, that's enough banter for now. It's time for a little nap. All those bloody mary's have given me scorching heartburn and I need to be primed for the weekend.

Be sure to check back in for more nuggets of naughtiness.

Smooches,
Daphne Ruth Jenkins